THE Thongs practically had
it all.
Earning about US$35 million a
year in a textile business, they were able to dine in some of the most
expensive restaurants, stay in top rate hotels and lead pretty much a very
comfortable life.
But that all not only
significantly changed for the Thongs – it also happened virtually overnight.
It was in one dreaded morning in
October of 2003.
Their younger boy, Elliot,
noticed that mum, Annie, didn’t look too well.
What was supposed to be a simple
visit to the doctor turned out to be a nightmare.
Annie, who had always avoided
going to a clinic or hospital during her working life, was diagnosed to have
suffered a major stroke.
She was admitted to a hospital
at once. All this happened in New York where she and her family were residing.
“This was the most difficult
episode in our lives. Everything suddenly started to collapse right in front of
our eyes,” said Tom Thong who worked for Annie as her chauffer and then married
her about 40 years ago.
“The Annie we all love was
reduced to a vegetable,” Tom went on to explain.
“The hospital kept Annie for a
month and had to discharge her under their policy. We had to readmit her to
another hospital or take her home.
“We opted for the latter because
we couldn’t afford the hospitalisation costs.”
When Annie returned to her
double-storey house she was not much different than from what she was since she
suffered a stroke, according to Tom.
“Annie who was born in the Year
of the Tiger and a very strong and independent person, was suddenly dependent
on us to do everything for her,” said Tom pointing out that it was very hard
for her to accept her situation.
Tom put an inflatable mattress
on the floor in the living room downstairs where he became a full-time
caregiver to his loving wife.
Everything was done for her from
there – her meals, bath, toileting and so on. Annie was unable to sit, stand,
walk or even talk.
She could only utter sounds. And
it wasn’t difficult to Tom to know when she was upset.
Little by little, they devised a
way to communicate with each other – Tom learning to ask the right questions
and Annie making various sounds for what she wanted.
“Even my boys at home had to
learn to be responsible for themselves soon after realising that their mum was
not able to do things she used to do for them any longer.
“It became even harder when
Annie refused to see some of her relatives and close friends. I knew that she
didn’t want them to see her in such a helpless situation,” said Tom.
But over time, the situation
began to slowly improve for Tom and Annie. They had worked out a routine each
day about what needs to be done for life for the family to continue.
Annie’s condition also started
to improve where she is able to walk a few steps with support now. She can also
put together a few words even though it takes some time to do so.
The Thongs who lived in the
United States for 25 years are now back to Malaysia and living in Old Klang
Road in Kuala Lumpur.
They do make overseas trips
occasionally.
Tom, 65, who makes it a point to
take Annie, 63, out with him – albeit in a wheelchair - when necessary would
like to see more wheelchair-friendly access in more buildings, especially
restaurants.
He stressed that that providing
for such features will give more opportunities for many others like him and his
wife in getting out and about in our society.
“It is a very vital part of
rehabilitation for people after stroke.” He said.
Despite what happened in their
lives, the Thongs see everything that happened in their lives as a blessing
from God.
“Living an extravagant lifestyle
like driving a Mercedes in New York and wearing only branded attire and objects
may sound tantalising to many people.
“However, living such a
lifestyle also brings on unnecessary stress and a certain responsibility as
well that could rob one of knowing what really matters in life in the end of
the day,” said Tom.
“The disability that my wife and
I went through – and still do today – has brought us much closer to each other
and our children than we could have ever imagined if nothing had happened.
“There were times when we spent
as many as 6 months away from each other when we were working. The experience
has taught us what is truly priceless in our lives that we should cherish
forever.” Tom concluded.
Tom and Annie will be spending
Chinese New Year with Tom’s parents in KL.
The End
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